im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
How's work?
Spinning.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
