It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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