the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
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