got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
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