I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
