I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize