I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i would punch a child for taco bell
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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