too bad you live with your parents still
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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