No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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