She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I've blown a few things in my day
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
So here I am, sexting at work.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
