You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Randomize
