so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
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