White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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