We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
