Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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