we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
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