question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize
