Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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