Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
