Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
i think my mom watched the whole time
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
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