I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
