You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
