did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
