I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
