I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
