hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
