i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
