you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
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