Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
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