Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
