Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
