You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
