You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
we're chasing vodka with high fives
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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