This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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