i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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