We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
NoShamevember. You game?
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
