I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
