It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
