Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
