Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
