yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
