Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
