i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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