wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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