i don't like sucking hair
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize
