So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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