I wannas sexs uuuuu
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
