is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
