you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
