Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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